A number of people have asked if there’s a definitive ‘Break Up Survival Guide‘ available. Honestly, I don’t think a single guide could do justice to the whole array of differing types of break ups out there.
Did you do the dumping? Were you dumped? Are you sad because you miss the one true love of your life, or because you can’t bear the fact they’ve moved on and found someone else to replace you?
In order to survive your break up, you need to understand why it happened, what part you played in it, and then you can start thinking about whether it’s fixable or whether you need to concentrate your energies on getting over it.
With that said, there are plenty of time tested tips that can help you move on regardless of your particular situation.
- Stay with the reality of what your ex was really like. It’s too easy when you’re struggling to deal with a break up to forget the fact that they never helped with the dishes, they never wanted to spend time with your mates, their cheating wasn’t the result of something you did or didn’t do, they somehow always felt sick when you wanted to go someplace special…
- It’s ok to think badly of them and SAY so. Why is it that we constantly feel the need to not think bad thoughts about someone who totally trashed our hearts and souls? Hmm, perhaps because we’ve been conditioned to think that makes us ‘bitter’. And nobody wants to be classed as bitter do they? Look at it this way. Calling a victim bitter is a good ‘get out clause’ for the perps out there. Don’t be fooled by it.
- Indulge yourself. Think of all the things you wanted to do when you were together, but couldn’t for whatever reason. Then go out and do them. Note you might not be able to do them all at the same time! But remember that you are now free to be your own boss. You get to do, say, go, act, think and feel however you damn well please.
- Commit to never contacting them. Unfortunately, sometimes you will still have to have dealings with your ex, especially if children are involved. But even then, you can usually arrange things through a third party. And always make sure your contacts are only about absolute necessities. Once you’re more comfortable with the break up, you’ll be able to manage ‘other’ conversations much better.
- Work on your image. New hair, new clothes, new perfume… this gives you a double whammy because not only do you feel much better about yourself, but you can bet your ass your ex is going to be wondering what the hell is going on in your life to make you look so good.
And finally, if you really do feel the need to indulge in a real break up guide, then check out “It’s Called A BreakUp Because It’s Broken” over on Amazon. Even if it doesn’t help you get over the break up of your relationship, it’ll have you rolling on the floor laughing. And laughter is the first step in getting your life back on track.
Related Posts:
- Breakup Advice – 5 Tips to Help You Survive A Breakup and Get Back With Your Ex At The Same Time
- When A Relationship Is Over
- How to Get Over An Ex
Tags: break up advice, break up guide, break up surivival guide, get over an ex, survive a break up
