There’s no doubt that getting back with an ex is not only possible, it’s practically guaranteed if you go about it the right way. Unfortunately, far too many former lovers can’t or won’t take the time to think it through and instead go off at a tangent, destroying any chance they might have had of making up and getting back together.

And by far the biggest mistake that people make is trying to make their ex jealous at every available opportunity. Yes, of course you want your ex to think that you can live without them. Yes, of course you want your former lover to see you having fun and moving on with your life. Being miserable, moping around and bursting into tears every time you see them is hardly likely to make you look very attractive is it?

But neither will your former lover find you very attractive if they see you swooning with another partner immediately after your break up with them. That’s hardly going to do their own ego any good!

And what about the poor guy or gal that you’re using in this sick game? Can you imagine how much hurt you’re causing them? Ok, so “all’s fair in love and war”, but is it? Let’s be very clear here. Fooling around with people’s emotions is a very dangerous and not very attractive game. There’s a reason that jealousy is known as the “Green Eyed Monster“.

Let’s assume for a moment that it actually works and you get back together with your ex after having them writhing in agony after seeing you with someone else. Do you think they’ll still find you as attractive when they discover you deliberately set out to cause them all that hurt and anguish?

If you think that getting back with an ex starts with putting them through the pain of seeing their former lover in the arms of someone else, I can assure you this is a big, BIG mistake. You’ll only end up making both of your lives even more miserable. And any chance of a reconciliation will no doubt be as likely as finding a snowflake in hell.

By all means show your ex that you’ve moved on, even if you haven’t. Let them know your life didn’t end when they walked out the door. Don’t involve them in your life in any way. They don’t need to know where you’re going, who you’re going with, what you’re up to… in fact, I can tell you from personal experience, that keeping the details of what you’re up to (and especially the details of what you’re NOT up to) is a much more powerful way to get your ex back.

The more they don’t know, the more they’ll wonder what’s going on. And the more they are wondering about you, the more likely they are to realise that breaking up in the first place was a big mistake.

That’s assuming of course that the break up was a mistake? Sometimes when you get round to actually living the life that you’ve put on hold in order to be with your lover, you realise that the break up wasn’t actually a mistake but a way of helping you rediscover yourself.

Once you accomplish that, getting back with your ex is much more likely to result in staying together instead of just jumping from break up to break up.