You know, sometimes you try so hard to get back together with an ex and yet it just doesn’t happen. You read stories and messages all over the Internet from folks who’ve tried every step they can think of, who’ve bought all the ‘get back with your ex’ books, who’ve had readings from psychics… and yet they’re still no nearer to getting back with their ex.

Then there are those who seem to manage it with no trouble at all. They take the advice, apply it and BAM, they’re back with their lover and living happily ever after.

So why doesn’t it work for everyone? What stops those people who are really trying to get back together from doing so? Well, I came across an article today that offers 3 possible reasons.

1. Fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of being hurt. Fear of what your ex will say. Fear of putting yourself out there “on the line.” Fear of the unknown — what COULD happen!

It’s enough to hinder you to the point of inaction.

But the fact remains, if you don’t “put yourself out there” sometimes, you won’t get anywhere. No risk, no reward.

Don’t be afraid. As long as you avoid the mistakes from the Biggest Breakup Mistakes series, only good things can happen!

2. Pride. This runs neck and neck with fear as a top reason couples are unable to get back together.

Let’s face it, at the end of a relationship, things are said and done which are often regrettable.

Our feelings are hurt. Our egos are damaged. And in order to recover and cope with the breakup, we cling to our pride.

Add to that our basic human desire to be “right.”

We desperately want to believe that we are in the right, and our ex is in the wrong.

It’s our way of telling ourselves that we are ok. There’s nothing wrong with this. We are ok and it’s good that we think well of ourselves during tough times like this.

But often our pride prevents us from moving int he right direction with our ex’s.

It prevents us from saying how we REALLY feel. Or it prevents us from really tackling the core reason why you broke up in the first place.

Frankly, we would be best served by humbling ourselves and opening ourselves up to our special someone. If your ex is indeed your true love, you should be able to demonstrate humility, let go of your pride and be completely open and honest.

If you are can overcome your pride, then chances are you can overlook past mistakes and forgive your ex. Or maybe it will give you the strength to ask for forgiveness yourself if it is needed. Or it will help you to tackle the real issues that are keeping you apart.

3. Inability to overcome obstacles.

Many times we allow an obstacle to get in the way of reconciling. It’s just too easy to say “oh well, I tried.” I know because I’ve done it!

But in the end, there’s a solution for every obstacle. That’s right, every one of them.

Despite what the gurus would have you believe, there are no solutions that work 100% of the time, simply because we all possess free will to do as we please. If anyone tells you otherwise, run (don’t walk) in the other direction!

That said, there are things we can do to overcome all obstacles. For every situation, there is a solution.

Let me say that again….

For every situation, there is a solution.

Personally, I think fear deserves its place at the top, though not necessarily for the reasons the author of this article gives. No matter how much we love our ex, there is the fear that if we reconcile it might lead to another break up. And let’s face it, none of us want to feel that amount of pain and hurt ever again!

But if you truly love someone, you have to get over that fear and you have to be willing to take the risk. Even if you want to move on and find someone new, the fear of being hurt all over again has to be overcome or the risk is that you will never find love again, with anyone.

I really hope your fear doesn’t stop you from getting back with your ex, or from moving on and finding love with someone new. It’s ok to be afraid. In fact, it’s to be expected. But don’t let it rule your heart and ruin your chance at finding love again.