High-Risk Behaviors and Infidelity

This section may be obvious, but at the same time, it’s good to be refreshed and given the understanding of how this behavior, even if it’s seemingly innocent, can be dangerous and potentially lead to infidelity.

Friendships Involving the Opposite Sex

Opposite-sex friendships don’t always result in affairs and infidelities, however, there are some things you may want to look out for if you think your partner or loved one is susceptible to cheating. If your partner becomes more secretive about the type of conversations or interactions they have with their opposite-sex friend, or becomes more withdrawn, this can be a sign that they’re developing an unhealthy emotional attachment with the other person. You should also pay attention to whether or not there seems to be a growing void in the intimacy between you two when this other person seems to spend time with your spouse.

Workplace Relationships

An overwhelming amount of people are developing friendships with people they meet at the office, including people of the opposite sex. Although it goes without saying that, for the most part, workplace affairs are highly volatile and dangerous, especially if they don’t last, the fact of the matter is that many people have succumbed to an office affair.

To an extent, this makes a little bit of sense. On average, you spend your whole day, and most of your waking hours with the people you work with. A home away from home, building intimate relationships with the people you work with can make you feel higher levels of job satisfaction and increase your confidence in the workplace. But, when it interferes with your personal time, and relationships at home, there is an increased vulnerability to cheat, especially if you develop an emotional bond with someone who seems to be there even when your lover isn’t.

Attending Social Events Alone

When asked, mistresses have often answered that they were able to tell which men were “happily involved” or not by the messages they sent out. While there weren’t many tangible and obvious displays of unhappiness that could be identified by the men who were targeted, the truth is most happily involved people don’t make a continuous and regular habit of going out to eat or enjoy “date-like” activities by themselves.

More importantly, the subconscious signals that unhappy men and women send can draw people who prey on their unhappiness right into their lives. The people who don’t want to be more than just lovers “on the side” simply want to occupy the person’s time for a little while; their hope is that each party can make each other happy for a temporary bit of time. People who are happily involved, even if they’re going through a rough patch, don’t send out “distress” signals for people to pick up on, and therefore don’t make themselves readily available for infidelity partners.

Fantasizing

Fantasizing about other people you’re attracted to, whether sexually or emotionally, is a dangerous behavior. You’re occupying your mind with thoughts of another person, and can easily idealize them in a way that compromises how you perceive your spouse if you’re not careful. Wondering what another person is doing when she’s not around, or what a coworker looks like undressed can seem innocent and harmless, but depending on the individual and the situational factors surrounding these thoughts, these are high-risk triggers that create problems for your relationship and increase your vulnerability to an affair.

Use of the Internet and Personal Technology

Depending on your viewpoints, pornography, sexting (sex text messaging or sexy chats with others on your phone), cybersex, phone sex or even flirtation can be seen as compromises to your relationship. It’s important to discuss these boundaries with your partner prior to having a relationship, but going even further,looking for old classmates or developing “relationships” with people online can compromise the fidelity in your relationship. While this is not a guaranteed threat to every relationship, it is something one should be vigilant to analyze in regards to the effect it has to their marriage.

Elle Peterson is the more vocal presence of He Cheated on Me, an informative relationship weblog with an enhanced concentration on infidelity and cheating.

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